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Why I Fell In Love With An Alcoholic
There are four reasons why I fell in love with someone suffering from addiction. When I took self-inventory of why I was continuing to tolerate his behavior in my life, I identified my top four payoffs:
1. I was scared to upset anyone and say no. I wanted to please everyone. Ruffling feathers and asking for the attention and help required to get a divorce felt selfish and embarrassing. Plus, how could I survive financially - he was not going to be happy paying child support. And … what would the kids think?
2. His sickness made me feel important and needed. I felt wanted when he needed help.
3. Most of the time, I could always compare myself to him and feel superior. I was a mess, but at least I was the strong and sober one in our relationship.
4. Lastly, it was very convenient to be in love with someone with a disease, so the blame and focus were always on him — and never on my issues.
Can you relate to any of these? I would LOVE to hear your thoughts.