Good Boundaries - Do You Have Them?

Enforcing good boundaries is the key to remaining strong and controlling your emotions, words, and decisions.

Before we get started I just wanted to say: I am so glad you’re here. I love writing for you. Thank you for trusting me. I truly believe you found me for a reason and I hope I am serving you well.

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Here's the loving truth: When you love someone suffering from addiction, it's important for your health to have boundaries. Enforcing good boundaries is the key to remaining strong and controlling your emotions, words, and decisions. 

For years, I thought I understood what a boundary was. I even thought I was implementing them in my home and my relationships.

But it turns out I was wrong.

Boundaries can be really confusing, and I don't want you to make the same mistakes I did.

Today we will cover the basic questions: what exactly is a boundary, and why do I need them?

Here's a visualization that might help: Imagine yourself walking along the beach, and you find a stick. You take that stick and draw a big long line across the sand.

Boundaries are lines in the sand that tell others, "I'm not willing to cross this line. This is as far as I will go.

You can walk next to me, but there's a point I will need to stop. And when we reach my line, I would love for you to respect and stay with me, but if you must step over my line, you will need to do it alone.

I will no longer be walking with you. I might be waiting if you decide to cross my line and then come back and join me. And I may miss you, or I may miss only parts of you. But I will not cross this line."

Examples of boundaries (lines in the sand):